Discussion Guide

Rise stories can help you start discussions in support groups and parenting classes. If you are a parent advocate or work with parents in a group setting, have your group read the story out loud and use the questions below to guide a discussion.

November 2007 Story:
‘It Won’t Happen Again’ by Youshell Williams

SUMMMARY:
When Youshell becomes depressed and loses her children to foster care, she loses confidence in herself as a parent and her children’s trust that she can be counted on to take care of them. After three years, her children come home angry and fearful. Family therapy helps Youshell reconnect with her kids and regain her sense of strength.

This is a good story to read with parents who are working to reunite with their children or whose children have returned home.

DISCUSSION:
Begin by asking the group’s general impression of what they read. How did the story affect them? What stood out for them the most? From their responses, you can lead the discussion where parents are interested in taking it.

Here are some questions you might pose to your group:

  • Youshell sees herself as a strong woman and mother. What do you see as her strengths? What steps does she take to protect her children? What do you see as your own strengths as a parent

  • When Youshell became “short-tempered and angry and cried a lot,” she felt ashamed of being weak. She turned down support saying, “I felt I was too strong for that nonsense.” Have there been times in your life when you wanted help but turned it down? What has helped you accept support when you’ve needed it?
  • While her kids were in care, Youshell felt shame and fear. She writes, “I didn’t think that I deserved my children.” How is Youshell able to regain her confidence as a mother? Are there times when you’ve worried that you couldn’t provide what your kids needed from you? How have you dealt with those feelings?
  • At first Youshell is overwhelmed by her children’s anger. Later she finds that family therapy helps them understand each other. When have you felt overwhelmed by the process of reuniting with your children? What have you found helpful as you and your children try to trust again.

Finally, the group can discuss what they learned from the story and what parts they related to the most. What steps or insights that Youshell describes might help them and their children?

(back to top)